Opinion > May 1, 2008

By Hannah Werthan | Asst. opinion editor

Here at Wake Forest we have to struggle with a multitude of distractions. On any given weekday afternoon, I cannot help but feel bombarded by what I would deem as superior alternatives to studying and doing homework.

I can play 20 games of solitaire, rent a movie from the library or, since the weather has been nice, lay on Bostwick’s sundeck with a trashy chick lit book and pretend it’s summer. However, the worst distraction that absorbs roughly 90 percent of my time is none other than Facebook.

I think this obsession stems from the fact that Facebook was banned at my high school, which made me spend 90 percent of my time dreaming of Facebook or trying to hack onto the site.

I’m like a kid who has been denied chocolate for all her life and suddenly it’s available all the time. Clearly, my school trained me to be an addict.

The first problem is that you can view pictures on this glorious Web site. What is the best way to get to know someone? According to Facebook, the answer is to view his/her 1,031 drunken pictures from every single frat party attended at this school. Curious what happened last night while you were stuck studying for that damn economics test?

With the help of the photos button on the left sidebar, you can easily view the latest photo albums.

With some creativity, you can decide that last night wasn’t that fun anyway, and, although you ended up with a C- on the test, at least you didn’t have to witness the awkward hookups that were instantly detagged.

Next on the list of benefits is the Facebook wall. This wall is a huge triumph for me, as I try to avoid unnecessarily awkward human interaction at all costs. Almost anything can be conveyed over the wall. Want to break up with someone but don’t feel the need to see him/her face-to-face or talk over the phone? No problem. Just write a quick message on his/her wall.

More appropriately, if you need math notes or want to know when the next test is, you can send a wall post to that classmate in the front row you may have said “hi” to once or twice. Since many people seem to have the same Facebook obsession that I do, you’re likely to get a fast response.

Now Facebook has even taken it up a notch and added the Facebook chat. Personally, I’ve found this to be borderline creepy, but I’m sure I’ll get used to it. If Facebook has it, it must be acceptable. I can’t say that Facebook has been entirely detrimental to my intelligence. My favorite application is Scrabulous, which is online Scrabble with a much cooler name. This is the main reason why I check Facebook as frequently as possible.

I must say that I have learned about a ton of new words that I did not know existed, especially the two-letter words. I may not know what the heck “qi” means, but I now know that it is a word and that has to count for something, right?

Okay, Facebook has little value on this earth other than to promote stalking and provide distraction. But, at least when my GPA turns out to be lower than expected, I can always place the blame on the creators of Facebook. Thanks a lot, guys.

Hannah Werthan is a freshman from Nashville, Tenn.