Life > January 30, 2003

By Dana Zelig

Old Gold and Black Reporter

If you saw the signs but were too embarrassed to check it out, thought they were a joke, or simply too good to be true, you missed one of the most interesting “lectures” I’ve seen here at Wake.

Jan. 28th in Pugh Auditorium students turned out to cheer on their friends and fraternity brothers or sorority sisters as they demonstrated “The Art of Kissing.”

The show, sponsored by Student Union in anticipation of our infamous Pledge Night, was presented by former Boston College Professor Michael Christian, author of the groundbreaking book The Art of Kissing.

Christian, who writes under the pen name William Cane, is not exactly what you would expect when you think of a kissing expert. With a small build, thick glasses and a New York accent, he reminded me more of Woody Allen than, say, Fabio.

Nevertheless, he seemed to know what he was talking about, so we stuck around looking for entertainment, and maybe some advice.

The set-up was what you might expect for a show on kissing, if you’ve ever considered such a thing. On the stage there were four pairs of chairs for the eight volunteer demonstrators to use, and I say “use” because they definitely did more than just sit in them.

The lights were turned down for that romantic mood effect, and music and slides combined to make “The Art” a hands-on multimedia experience.

The gentlemen who volunteered their lips were four sophomore members of the Kappa Sigma fraternity, James Query, Adam Simon, Andrew Preston, and Andrew Baugham. The ladies were two junior Kappa Deltas, Lindsay Childers and Megan Jaquette, and two freshmen Pi Beta Phi pledges, Cat Hlavaty and Becky Sarles.

According to Childers, none of the couples really knew each other, but had met 30-45 minutes before the show to get acquainted and “loosen up.”

She got involved in the project through her roommate, who is a member of the Student Union.

Hlavaty had a much more charitable intent. “I think it’s really important, considering that Pledge Night is coming up, that the students at Wake be informed of the art of kissing. They need to know how to do it right,” she said after the show.

The Kappa Sigs seemed to enjoy themselves, although kissing in front of so many people was a new and somewhat awkward experience for some of them. James Query told me he “thought it was a good time. It was fun, especially because it is something new to Wake Forest, because it’s known as a school where nobody hooks up.”

Well I wouldn’t say nobody, but there don’t seem to be an abundance of dates. Query and the others were good sports about the show, which they said was “definitely awkward at times.” No doubt.

Note to my female readers: they looked pretty talented … WIN-stalk them, go!

Christian also stuck around to answer a few questions after the show. My biggest question was, what on Earth inspired you to write these books? “I thought it would be something of universal interest, and it turns out that it is,” said the best-selling author of books like How To French Kiss.

I was also interested to know how he did all his “research,” for the books, which serve as how-to manuals for the kissing-impaired or simply those who want to learn a few new tricks.

“Well I wanted to do all the research personally, but my publisher thought I should take a more objective approach,” Christian said.

To conduct this objective research, he collected 100,000 surveys from 23 countries posing questions such as: What is your favorite kiss? What do you think about when you are kissing someone?  How do you get someone to kiss you? 

He answers these questions and more in his books and with his instructional videos (easy, killers, they are all PG-rated).

But the demonstration, which included the neck kiss, the biting kiss, the vacuum kiss, Lip-o-suction, and most importantly, the French kiss, complete with a “huge mouth simulation” was enough education for me.

The students kissed standing up, sitting down, pretended they were in a car, and in some cases, even took their partners to the ground when the passion moved them.

For those of you still interested, check out the kissing Web site at (easily enough) kissing.com. “Cane’s” email address and phone number are provided, and guess what, he really answers your questions! 

So send him a note, only don’t ask him how to get rid of hickies, because as he informed us, they are bruises and must heal on their own.

Remember to avoid hickies this weekend, or use them as a way to remind yourself of just what went down on the one night of the year that you can get as “Dirrty” as you damn well please.