Life > April 16, 2003

By Dana Zelig

Old Gold and Black Reviewer

So it’s almost May. Finals are over, you are still peeling from Post-Exams, summer has arrived. Now what?  Like most people you will probably be working as a lifeguard or in the mall, or if you are really motivated you have a sweet internship lined up.

Unfortunately, most students can also look forward to almost four months of living at home with the ‘rents and your annoying little siblings. After you’ve crashed your best friend’s pool for the fourth time and you are sick of loitering at the 7-11, you realize you have a whole summer to kill — what to do? 

My suggestion: grab your popcorn and an old flame and park your butt at the movie theater, it’s going to be a good year for Big Summer Flicks, especially sequels. Here are five films you don’t want to miss.

1. Bruce Almighty stars Jim Carrey, Morgan Freeman and Jennifer Aniston is the latest from the comic powerhouse who brought us Ace Ventura, Liar Liar, and the hilarious Me, Myself, and Irene. Carrey plays Bruce Nolan, a “public interest” television reporter in New York who is fed up with his life. Though he seems to have everything he could want, like fame, popularity and his beautiful girlfriend Grace (Aniston), the “worst day of his life” makes him feel as though God has given up on him, and in a rage, he curses God.

The film’s premise lies in God (Freeman), who appears to Bruce to give him a chance to do things better himself. So, equipped with divine power, Bruce creates chaos as only Carrey can, in the film that asks: “If you could be God for one week, what would you do ? Who would you help? How would you handle the most powerful responsibility in the universe?”  Find out May 23.

2. X2 — The X-Men Sequel is a continuation of the Marvel Comic saga that first hit the big screen two years ago. We see the return of Wolverine (Hugh Jackman), Jean Gray (Famke Jannsen), Cyclops (James Marsden), Rogue (Anna Paquin), Storm (Halle Berry), Professor X (Patrick Stewart) and his arch enemy Magneto (Ian McKellan). Added to the X-Men team are Iceman (Rogue’s love interest) and Pyro, and new villains Nightcrawler and Deathstrike. Professor X and his squad must once again fight to protect the students at the Mutant Academy from meddling government officials and the prejudice of society at large.

Complicating matters is Magneto, who manages to escape his plastic prison and means trouble for the X-Men. For anyone unacquainted with the first movie, I saw it the night it came out and loved it. Even if you’ve never read the comics (or watched the cartoon series) there is plenty of action, special effects and sexual tension. X2 opens May 2.

3. The Matrix Reloaded is the long awaited second part of the Matrix Trilogy that has Matrix buffs (ok, I admit it) drooling. Snagged by budget problems and the   death of singer/actress Aaliyah, the project is long overdue but will finally hit theaters this summer.

Keanu Reeves, Carrie-Ann Moss and Laurence Fishburne return as Neo, Trinity and Morpheus, saving humans from the machines who have enslaved the human race. Jada Pinkett Smith has stepped in to play the role of Niobe for the late Aaliyah. Fans of the first film will recognize Agent Smith, Neo’s primary nemesis. Smith is also joined by new double-threat The Twins, a pair of long-haired albino bad guys.

I’ll be watching for the mythology, the amazing fight sequences and effects and for the steamy sex scene between Neo and Trinity that I glimpsed in the online trailer. The sequel finally hits theaters May 15 and you know that they will be full.

4. Charlie’s Angels: Full Throttle once again stars Drew Barrymore, Lucy Liu and Cameron Diaz as the trio of vintage femme fatales who fight crime, and look good doing it.

Bernie Mac (The Bernie Mac Show) takes over as Bosley, previously played by Bill Murray. Demi Moore also stars in this sequel as Madison Lee, who we can assume will be at the heart of whatever evil plan the Angels must foil.

With stunts as unrealistic as a Bond movie and as many scantily clad women, it may also feature the kind of corny jokes 007 would crack. While the movie might not be the most anticipated, it promises to be entertaining with its good soundtrack and impressive martial arts, which the actresses insisted on learning themselves. It will be released sometime this summer to the delight of teeny boppers and lonely boys everywhere; I know you’re out there.

5. Pirates of the Caribbean- The Curse of the Black Pearl is definitely the movie I am most anticipating this summer. I happened to catch the five minute trailer at the gym the other night and sat with my mouth hanging open until it was over … or until I drooled on my magazine.

This movie was (duh) conceptualized from the popular Disney ride of the same name, but don’t expect cheesy animatronics here. The film features Orlando Bloom (Lord of the Rings) as Will Turner, an ambitious young man who joins forces to rescue the governor’s daughter from wily pirate Captain Barbossa (Geoffrey Rush) who has stolen the ship the Black Pearl and Turner’s love interest with it. Turner joins forces with Captain Jack Sparrow the true owner of the ship played by ... wait for it ... the tragically handsome and swarthy Johnny Depp. Together Turner and Sparrow must rescue the ship and the girl, while fighting not only Barbossa, but a host of pirates and spirits that haunt the boat.

I highly suggest watching the trailer online, you will be impressed. If nothing else, we’re long overdue for a good swashbuckling movie.